


Breathe

by eclyptium



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Emotions, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-28
Updated: 2020-03-28
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:06:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23356672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eclyptium/pseuds/eclyptium
Summary: Soonyoung was sure Jihoon would be mad at him for sneaking into his studio again. Instead, he found Jihoon clutching his sleeve tightly and looking at him with tears in his eyes."I'm tired of these feelings, Soonyoung."
Relationships: Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi/Lee Jihoon | Woozi
Comments: 4
Kudos: 178





	Breathe

The wall clock reads 1:15AM and Soonyoung is fast asleep. He turns to his side, stretching his arm out to pull the person next to him.

To his surprise, however, he finds half of the bed empty: the pillow seems to be untouched, the blanket wrinkle-free. Soonyoung, despite his sleepy state, pushes up half of his body with his forearms and looks around the dark bedroom.

"Jihoon?" he calls out, but the room is empty except him.

Soonyoung stands up and drags himself to the bathroom. _Maybe he's just taking a late night shower,_ he thinks to himself. He takes a quick peek at the foot of the door, and after seeing that the light inside is turned off, he turns the knob and slightly turns the door.

Empty.

Soonyoung then leaves their shared bedroom, tip-toeing with sock-clad feet down the dimly-lit hallway all the way to their dorm’s kitchen.

Still, no Jihoon in sight.

But Soonyoung knows another place where he may find him.

\----

Soonyoung slightly turns up the volume of the radio as he drove to Jihoon’s studio. A mellow, instrumental piece plays, and Soonyoung blinks twice and grips the wheel harder to fight the heaviness that’s starting to set on his eyelids.

He makes a turn and parks the car. He turns off the ignition, grabs his keys and his parka on the passenger seat. After locking the car, he puts on his parka. He walks to the studio, unlocks the door and enters.

The studio is fairly quiet, except for a faint melody being played intermittently on a piano. Soonyoung squints as his eyes try to adjust in the darkness. The neon lights on the walls always remind Soonyoung of some sort of pub, minus the clamor of drunk people, the smell of smoke, and the loud music. 

Soonyoung spots a soft glow coming from one of the rooms. He takes a deep breath and presses on.

The door squeaks a little when Soonyoung opens it. He pokes his head in and finds Jihoon in front of his computer, headphones on and unbothered by his surroundings.

Jihoon hasn’t noticed Soonyoung yet, so the latter knocks on the door, even if he is already inside. First try - Jihoon's still occupied with what looks like a new song. The dancer tries again, this time putting more force into his knocks.

Jihoon, albeit with an alarmed look on his face,finally turns to Soonyoung.

"Soonyoung?" he croaks.

"Hi, Jihoon," Soonyoung grins at the singer.

Jihoon rubs his eyes. "What are you doing here?" Soonyoung can't help but notice that his voice has gotten hoarse, probably from singing or from the cold.

Soonyoung heads to the couch next to Jihoon's work desk and plops down with a small bounce.

"I kinda got worried when I woke up earlier and you weren't in bed.” Soonyoung leans back on the couch and looks at the ceiling.

Jihoon remains quiet and hangs his head.

Soonyoung minds the silence, so he sits up a little and peeks at Jihoon’s computer screen. “Whatcha working on, Ji?” he asks.

“Just a little something,” Jihoon mumbles.

“May I hear it?”

Soonyoung hears Jihoon sigh.

“Jihoon?” Soonyoung stands up from the couch and steps closer to the singer.

“I-it’s not ready yet,” Jihoon whispers,fingers absentmindedly tracing his keyboard.

Soonyoung presses his lips together and pulls an empty chair so he can sit next to Jihoon. He leans onto the desk with his elbow, his chin resting on his hand. He stares at Jihoon, and smiles when the latter lifts his head up and looks at him.

“Hi, Ji.”

“Hmmm.” Jihoon averts his gaze back to his screen.

Soonyoung pouts and leans in closer to Jihoon. “Are you mad I snuck in again?”

No answer.

“Ji?”

Jihoon throws his head back and exhales in exasperation. He then gives the dancer a stern look.

“No, I am not mad. But I will be if you keep on doing that.”

“Doing what?” Soonyoung teases.

Jihoon clicks his tongue and looks away from Soonyoung in an attempt to ignore him. “Leave me alone, Soonyoung.”

Soonyoung lets out a huff and slides his arms away from the desk. He knows it’s best to just let Jihoon carry on with his creative process, but he can’t help but notice how Jihoon stares blankly at the half-finished song on the music software.

“Jihoonie…” Soonyoung whispers. He places his hand on the smaller boy’s thigh, and he feels Jihoon stiffen under his touch.

“Is everything okay?” Soonyoung’s voice is silvery.

Jihoon slides off his headphones and slings them on his monitor. He then spins his chair to face the dancer. Without looking up, Jihoon drops his head onto Soonyoung’s chest.

“I’m tired,” Jihoon lets out, his voice breaking.

Soonyoung is taken aback all of a sudden, so he chooses to run his fingers through Jihoon’s soft hair. 

“Well, Ji,” his fingers trace lines on the smaller boy’s nape. “You _will_ be tired if you keep on staying up like this.”

Soonyoung feels Jihoon grip his parka’s sleeve.

“N-no, it’s not that,” Jihoon croaks. “I’m tired of these feelings, Soonyoung.”

Jihoon lifts his head up to look at the other boy. He inhales shakily, willing away the tears forming at the corner of his eyes.

“I'm tired of hiding how I feel all the time, I'm tired of the pressure, of having the whole world watch your every move."

Jihoon buries his face onto the crook of Soonyoung’s neck. "I just want to be me. Genuine, unfiltered...just, me."

“Ji,” Soonyoung whispers and softly cups the singer’s cheek. “Ji, look at me.”

And Jihoon does, his nose a little red and face moist from crying. Soonyoung’s heart sinks to his stomach. Seeing Jihoon fall apart like this hurt more than getting his body injured during practice.

“There’s always a bit of Lee Jihoon in everything you do,” he starts. “And for me, that makes it special. That makes _you_ special.”

Jihoon sniffles. “But, I’m tired of doing it for other people. I want to do it for me this time.”

Soonyoung thumbs away the tear running on his cheek. “You can, Ji,” he reassures the singer. “You can be passionate for yourself, whatever makes your little heart happy.” Soonyoung smiles gently and Jihoon feels himself relax to the taller boy’s touch.

“And hey,” Soonyoung pulls in Jihoon for a hug. “I’ll be here by your side through all this, Ji. I mean, that’s what I’m here for,” he’s back to gently caressing Jihoon’s locks.

Jihoon stays quiet, but he yields to the warmth of Soonyoung’s arms wrapped around him.

Soonyoung presses a quick kiss on Jihoon’s temple. “So please, Ji,” he softly says with his lips against Jihoon’s skin. “Breathe. Exhale. Just let it all out.”

Jihoon feels himself crumble, but Soonyoung is good at picking up his broken pieces and bringing him back together.

Soonyoung likes to kid around with him especially while they’re onstage. But it’s during rare moments like these that Jihoon knows that nothing can harm his little heart.

As long as he let Soonyoung hold it.

“Soonyoung,” Jihoon murmurs and looks up to meet Soonyoung’s eyes. The smaller boy has his arms wrapped around the dancer’s waist, sharing in the warmth of Soonyoung’s thick parka.

“Hmm?” Soonyoung slightly smiles.

“Can I kiss you?”

Soonyoung is sure Jihoon can hear his heart beating loudly in his chest. Jihoon still makes him nervous whenever they’re this intimate with one another.

“Go ahead, Ji,” Soonyoung breathes. “Kiss me.”

Jihoon leans in, planning to place a soft, fleeting kiss on Soonyoung’s lips. When their lips touch, though, Soonyoung circles his arm around Jihoon and pulls him in closer.

Jihoon moans softly as Soonyoung moves his lips against his. Jihoon feels like his arms are turning into jelly when Soonyoung traces his tongue along his lips, asking for entrance, to which Jihoon yields to.

Without breaking the kiss, Soonyoung gets up from his seat and climbs onto Jihoon to straddle him. Jihoon’s head is empty - all he can think of is how Soonyoung smells like his favorite milk soap, how Soonyoung’s kissing the life out of him.

_Soonyoung, Soonyoung, Soonyoung._

Jihoon stifles a whimper when Soonyoung breaks the kiss. They press their foreheads together, panting and smiling like idiots.

“It’s getting a little hot here, isn’t it?” Soonyoung kids, scrunching his nose. “Mind if I-” he quickly slides off his parka and lets it land on the floor.

Soonyoung makes a move to kiss Jihoon again, but the latter stops him halfway through by putting a hand on his chest.

“What?” Soonyoung tilts his head.

“Let’s move to the couch, your legs are going to hurt here.” Jihoon says, patting the dancer’s thighs. Soonyoung gets up and pulls Jihoon in again for a torrid kiss. Jihoon nearly trips on Soonyoung’s leg as they walk to the couch. He then pushes the taller boy onto it and gets on top of him.

Jihoon kisses Soonyoung’s forehead before moving down to his lips. Soonyoung’s hands make their way under Jihoon’s shirt, cold fingers meeting warm skin. Jihoon shivers, his lips going to Soonyoung’s neck. He mouths at the soft flesh, eliciting grunts from the dancer.

“J-Jihoon,” Soonyoung sighs. “Ji, baby.”

Jihoon lifts his head up to look at Soonyoung. “Hmm? Am I going too fast?”

“No, no.” Soonyoung chuckles. “Just, don’t leave marks. Seungcheol will kill me if he sees I have hickies. Again.”

Jihoon laughs.

“Alright,” Jihoon goes back to peppering kisses on Soonyoung’s neck. Soonyoung grunts when Jihoon darts his tongue out to lick his skin. He threads his fingers through Jihoon’s hair, relishing in the feeling of Jihoon’s mouth on him.

Jihoon kisses Soonyoung again, grasping onto the dancer’s shirt for balance. “Off, off.” Jihoon hurriedly says, tugging at the hem of Soonyoung’s shirt. Both of their tops get discarded onto the floor in just a matter of seconds.

Soonyoung grabs Jihoon by his thighs and flips their position, making the smaller boy lie on his back on the couch. Jihoon notes the flame in Soonyoung’s gaze as the latter looks at him, shirtless and breathing heavily.

Soonyoung touches Jihoon’s cheek and traces his lips. “You’re so pretty, Ji.” Jihoon kisses the dancer’s fingertips, then takes them into his mouth, all the while keeping his fiery gaze at Soonyoung.

“Fuck, Ji,” Soonyoung says in a gravelly voice. Jihoon teases Soonyoung even more by sucking on his fingers before letting them go with a pop. Soonyoung notes the tent in Jihoon’s pants, so he fluidly rolls his hips against Jihoon’s, making the smaller boy throw his head back and grab onto the couch’s cushion.

“Soonyoung, please,” Jihoon keened, rutting his hips, desperate for the slightest bit of friction to relieve the ache in his groin. “Want...want you.”

Soonyoung palms Jihoon’s hardness and uses his free hand to play with Jihoon’s nipples. Jihoon gasps, and gropes Soonyoung’s arm.

“Stop teasing,” Jihoon breathes and pulls on the garter of Soonyoung’s sweatpants. Jihoon, being impatient as he is, hastily tugs off Soonyoung’s pants and underwear. Soonyoung hisses when cold air hits his length, and lets out a throaty groan when Jihoon takes it into his hands.

Soonyoung subconsciously thrusts into Jihoon’s fist and grips the smaller boy’s shoulder. “Shit, Ji,” Soonyoung choked out.

Jihoon pauses and manages to sit up. Soonyoung looks at him again, trying to figure out his next move.

"Something wrong, baby?" Soonyoung asks, voice sounding a bit hoarse.

"Sit down," Jihoon commands. "I wanna make you feel good."

Soonyoung kicks off his pants and underwear and does as he's told. He spreads his legs, feeling a bit exposed as Jihoon takes in the sight of a completely naked Soonyoung.

Jihoon smirks at him. "You look ridiculously good on this couch, Soonie," he teases.

Soonyoung's breath hitches when Jihoon gets on his knees and immediately takes his cock into his mouth. Soonyoung closes his eyes and moans lowly, reveling in the warmth of Jihoon's mouth. Jihoon flats out his tongue as he sucks, making sure he swipes along the spot that makes Soonyoung go crazy. Soonyoung grabs a fistful of Jihoon's hair when the singer takes his length in one go.

"Fuck, that feels so good Ji," Soonyoung groans, feeling tension build at the pit of his stomach. Jihoon takes this encouragement and bobs his head faster. The smaller boy whimpers every time Soonyoung's dick hits the back of his throat, but he doesn't mind at all.

_As long as it's Soonyoung._

Soonyoung grips Jihoon's nape in an attempt to pry off the smaller boy from his cock, but Jihoon is too eager to stop. He only pauses when Soonyoung tugs at his hair.

"Ji, baby," Soonyoung pants. "As much as I love your mouth, I don't want to cum yet."

He pulls Jihoon up back to his lap, and only then does Soonyoung realize that Jihoon still had his pants on.

"Can I take these off?" Soonyoung coos.

Jihoon frantically nods. "Yes, please."

Soonyoung unties the drawstring of Jihoon's pants, then slowly slides his pants off until they're bunched around his knees. Jihoon discards them, impatient, wanting to feel Soonyoung skin-on-skin. He places his hands on Soonyoung’s shoulders as he straddles the dancer.

“Kiss me again, Ji,” Soonyoung orders.

Jihoon obliges, pressing their lips together in a gentle kiss. They both stay still, relishing in their scents and the warmth of their lips.

Jihoon feels like he can just melt into Soonyoung’s embrace.

“Soonie,” Jihoon mutters against the dancer’s lips and grinds against him. “Want you, inside.”

Soonyoung places a quick kiss on Jihoon’s neck. “We need lube first,” he says.

“Ah, wait,” Jihoon gets off Soonyoung and walks to his computer desk to retrieve a bottle from the drawer. Soonyoung smirks, gaze fixed on Jihoon’s naked figure.

“Nice ass, Ji,” Soonyoung teases, making Jihoon quickly turn to face him, face all red.

“Shut up, Soonyoung,” Jihoon chuckles.

“I will if you get back here,” Soonyoung says with a smug look on his face.

Jihoon rolls his eyes, smiling as he walks back to the red couch. He gets on top of Soonyoung and kisses the corner of his lips. He hands the bottle of lube to Soonyoung, who makes quick work of uncapping it and pouring a liberal amount on his fingers. 

Soonyoung spreads Jihoon’s thighs and slowly slides in a finger inside the smaller boy. Jihoon lets out a throaty whimper and digs his fingernails onto Soonyoung’s forearm. Soonyoung licks a stripe up Jihoon’s neck and inserts another finger into him to stretch him more. Jihoon ruts against him desperately, making Soonyoung grunt as their cocks rub.

“More, more,” Jihoon gasps. “Just get in me, Soonyoung.”

Soonyoung growls and kisses Jihoon feverishly, shoving his tongue into the smaller boy’s mouth. He pulls his fingers out of Jihoon and grabs the bottle of lube again.

“Wait,” Jihoon breathes. “Let me do it,” he motions to the lube bottle. Soonyoung smiles and hands it over to Jihoon. The singer opens the bottle and squeezes an ample amount onto his palm. Jihoon then applies lube onto Soonyoung’s length, making the latter throw his head back and gasps. Jihoon keeps his eyes fixed on Soonyoung, biting his lips as he strokes the dancer’s cock.

Jihoon lifts himself up and lines Soonyoung’s length to his hole, quivering a little when the tip touches his entrance.

“Look at me, Jihoon,” Soonyoung commands in a gravelly voice, lifting up Jihoon’s face with his fingertips.

“I wanna see how good I make you feel.”

Jihoon moans out loud when he bottoms out, his dick getting harder as Soonyoung stares at him while he’s falling apart from pleasure. He scrambles to grab Soonyoung’s toned shoulders as he starts to move up and down the dancer’s length.

“F-fuck, Soonyoung…” Jihoon keens, reveling in the sensation of Soonyoung's cock stretching him.

His hands caress up and down Soonyoung's torso as he moves his hips. He's definitely missed this, he thinks. Just him and Soonyoung lost in their own little world, safe in one another's embrace.

"Jihoon," Soonyoung moans and buries his face onto the crook of Jihoon's neck. "You're doing so good, Ji. Fuck-" He mumbles against Jihoon's hot skin.

Soonyoung notices Jihoon's whimpers are getting louder, so he bucks his hips up in time with Jihoon's movements. He wraps his arms around the smaller boy's waist and crashes their lips together.

Jihoon increases his speed, but his movements are getting sloppier as he inches closer and closer to climax.

"Soonie…" Jihoon whimpers, throat hoarse from moaning. "Soonyoung… close… please touch-"

Soonyoung then wraps his free hand around Jihoon's cock and pumps. He, too, is getting near his orgasm, and Jihoon's squeals fuel the fire burning in his gut.

Jihoon then lets out stuttered moans and holds on to Soonyoung as his orgasm hits his body like a truck. White shoots from his cock as Soonyoung continues to jerk him off through his climax. Soonyoung grunts when he feels Jihoon clench around his cock. He licks into Jihoon's mouth as he fucks into the smaller boy faster.

"Jihoon, I'm coming, I-" Soonyoung half-sobs.

"Inside, Soonyoung." Jihoon breathes into Soonyoung's ear. With this, Soonyoung pulls Jihoon's ass flush against his cock and spills inside the smaller boy, moaning a string of "Jihoon, Jihoon" and shaking.

Jihoon collapses on top of Soonyoung. Both of them are covered in a sheen of sweat, panting as they come down from their highs. Jihoon closes his eyes and hugs Soonyoung tighter, enjoying the warmth emanating from the taller boy.

"Ji," Soonyoung whispers, stroking the singer's hair. "Hey, don't fall asleep yet. We have to clean up first."

Jihoon wiggles his hips a little, making Soonyoung hiss as he's still inside the smaller boy. Jihoon hums, his arms still wrapped around Soonyoung.

"Okay, but at least let me pull my dick out," Soonyoung quips.

Jihoon whines and pouts, but obliges. He sighs when Soonyoung pulls out, and a little bit of Soonyoung's mess trickles down his inner thigh. The dancer quickly grabs some tissues and wipes it off.

"There you go, now we can cuddle," Soonyoung chuckles and lies down on the couch. He then pulls Jihoon into another hug, making the smaller boy let out a small squeak when he lands on Soonyoung. Jihoon snuggles into the embrace, head resting on Soonyoung's shoulder. His body hurts a little, but he feels himself relax as he listens to Soonyoung's breathing.

"Soonyoung," Jihoon mumbles, his eyes closed.

"Hmm?" Soonyoung answers and kisses the top of Jihoon's head.

"Let's stay here, like this." Jihoon purrs.

Soonyoung smiles. "Yes but can we please get a blanket or something? I don't want your pretty ass freezing in the cold."

Jihoon groans. Sometimes he just wants to hit Soonyoung in the head for ruining romantic moments. "Fine," Jihoon says and stands up to retrieve a blanket from the cabinet on the other side of the room.

"Wait," Jihoon pauses in front of his computer and re-opens it. "Let me just-" Jihoon whispers, unplugging his headphones and tapping on the spacebar to play the song on his music software. A gentle tune then plays on his speakers.

Jihoon walks back to Soonyoung and crawls on top of him. They pull the blanket on top of them, sighing as they relax into one another's touch. As the instrumental song plays, Jihoon hums along and draws shapes on Soonyoung's skin.

Soonyoung closes his eyes and smiles. He loves Jihoon, but this is the Jihoon he loves most: the expressive, unfiltered Jihoon who always lets him in.

"Jihoon?" Soonyoung whispers, just as they're both about to fall asleep.

"Hmm?"

"It's beautiful," he answers. "Just keep doing what you love."

_So I can fall in love with you a little more every time you do._


End file.
